Two steps forward, one step back?

This has been an interesting week with Jaden. On Monday we had another doctor’s appointment, this time to get the three shots they didn’t want to give him on Friday (he had already been at the doctor’s office for so long for his first visit that they didn’t want to overwhelm him). So once again I make sure everything is together and the diaper bag is stocked and I put Jaden in the car seat to take off for the doctor’s office. They give him three shots, he cries like mad, and we go home. Thankfully the nurse had him face her when she gave him the shots, so I don’t look like the bad guy. 

Up until that point we had been progressing pretty well — naps were getting longer (closer to where they should be) and intervals between wake-ups at night were increasing with regularity. We were down to one diaper change and two feedings per night – which (believe it or not) was a tremendous improvement from the week before. We had also cut the formula back to where it should be for a 9 to 10 month old, and hadn’t had too many complaints.

Then something happened…. the shots maybe? The congestion he’s dealing with? The rash that has since covered his torso? Who knows – but since Monday I feel like we regressed exactly back to the day our plane landed in the U.S.. Last night was the worst of the worst — Jaden woke up about 6 times, with major screaming twice, and both of the screaming sessions ended up taking us over an hour before we could put him back to sleep. I think that we were up more than we were asleep. 

By the way – the doctor’s office said the rash is probably not from the shots, and we should just keep an eye on it and call them back if it doesn’t clear up in the next few days. I can see I’ll be getting to know everyone at the pediatrician’s office in record time. 

So that was the one step back  - on the forward side of things we are positive now that his “mmaammaa” is his way of calling me. It happened last week during the doctor’s appointment but I really wasn’t quite sure if he was calling me or asking for more, or milk, or even Elmo. This week, though, it became more and more evident that he really is attempting his version of mommy. This is especially obvious when he screams for mmmaaamaaaa when Neville tries to put him back to bed in the middle of the night. When mmaammaaa shows up to take him, he calms right down (even if he has no intention of sleeping). This behavior only started this week – for some reason he is preferring me at night – however, during the day, Daddy is much more fun to play with. Grandma says it might be because our smarty pants already realizes that he has Mommy wrapped around his chubby little finger. 

Breakthrough number two is also in the communication arena. We are trying to teach him sign language for certain words, like ‘milk,’ ‘eat’, ‘more’, ‘apple’, ‘change’ (i.e. diaper change), and ‘potty’. The one we have worked with the most is “more,” since it is easiest to sign while he is eating. I know he knows the sound of the word (as I mentioned in an earlier post, saying ‘more’ prompts him to open his mouth wide if he’s hungry), but since he likely won’t be able to say these words for some time, sign language gives us a way to communicate at an earlier stage. The goal is to alleviate some of the frustration involved when mommy doesn’t know what baby wants, and baby can’t figure out why mommy doesn’t get it.

So yesterday, during dinner, we had another “could it be?” moment when I thought I saw him sign for “more.”  At his age, his motor skills are not yet fully developed, so they (the books on baby sign language) say that you have to look for even slight indications that a baby is trying to sign. One of the indicators is a motion that looks almost like clapping when a child learns to sign ‘more.’ So either he was trying to clap, or he was signing for more. It’s all a mystery right now. The tell-tale sign will be if he uses it again in an appropriate situation.  We shall see.

As far as the sleep issues go: I’m reading a couple of books on how to get your children to sleep on their own without letting them “cry it out,” which we are told is a big no-no for adopted children – and besides, my heart wouldn’t stand for it. I’d rather rock him to sleep until he is a tween than to have to hear him ‘cry it out.’ I just can’t do it. 

Anyway – I’ll let you know if any of the books work. So far the first one hasn’t. It has made it easier for me to keep him asleep once he is asleep, but I think that unfortunately that means that if he wakes up and I’m not there, he can’t get back to sleep without me, and then he’s up again, no matter what the time.

“…..Mmaammaaa.”